Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Born This Way

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about what kind of mother I am. I'm a full-time work out of the home mom. I don't breastfeed on demand. My daughter sleeps in a co-sleeper (read: bassinet attached to the side of our bed). It's hard letting someone else share in her smiles and giggles and drool bubbles while I'm at work. But we do the best we can, don't we?

"My mama told me when I was young
We're all born superstars"

I don't dress my daughter only in pink clothing (though she does have a lot of it thanks to generous family and friends). We make a conscious effort to not push gender roles on her or put her into any boxes. I fully expect her to learn to appreciate rugby and cooking from her daddy and show tunes and fishing from me. She has lots of gay uncles and aunties. And a bisexual mama.

For every time I tell her that she's a "pretty girl" I also tell her she's smart, funny, silly, etc. My daughter will know that she has many attributes including but not limited to her looks. She will be kind and accepting because those are the values we will instill upon her.

"Don't hide yourself in regret,
Just love yourself and you're set
I'm on the right track, baby
I was born this way"

I don't want my daughter to ever feel like who she is or what/who she desires is wrong. She will learn to value herself and her opinions. She was born to be exactly who she is and no one can ever take that birthright away from her. If you live your life scared of what others might say or worried what they might think of you, you'll drown in regret. And my baby's gonna know how to swim. I will always be her lifesaver.

So I guess I know what kind of mother I am. The best I can be. And no matter what she grows up to be, I know that Amy will be the best she can be.


Anonymous said...

well said!!! ps you have a nice writing style jt

Amanda said...

Wow, Woman. You're truly inspiring! I'm in love with your convictions about raising Amy to be a passionate, thoughtful, and accepting person.

I was also thinking that I'm thrilled that you are raising Amy to know that while she is physically beautiful, she has value, and it doesn't ride on her appearance-- its about her fulfilling herself and being who she wants to be.

As much as you're blessed by Amy, she is so, so blessed to have you.